Today is the last day of a year. The last day of a decade. The last day of a season.
I've always been told by other people how strong of a person I am. Funny, because when I think about my own characteristics "strong" is not a feature I would use to describe myself. Well I guess this year decided to test my strength big time.
From heartbreak from not one - but TWO - relationships I thought would lead to marriage, to finding out my mom was diagnosed with breast cancer, to seeing my mom suffer through having to shave her own head and get her breasts removed (basically taking away the main parts of "femininity" that a woman has), to almost having my own life taken from me while being held at gunpoint and robbed in my own vehicle... this year was a huge test for me. It's tested my faith, my trust, and my strength like no other season of my life has.
BUT... I remember the day that everything came crashing down and I told my mom how I could only look at everything from a positive standpoint. What else COULD I do? I knew without a doubt that God's got me. He turns everything for the good for those who love him, which I do without a shadow of a doubt. He will fulfill his purpose over my life. Everything that's happened is just paving the way for something greater. And that's how I hope YOU can reflect on your trials and struggles. Know that he holds your life in his hand and only wants what's best for you; everything else will crumble.
Two songs have been an anthem on my life this year. One from Bethel Music and one from Vertical Worship. I'll share the lyrics that really impacted my life this season and made a mark on the beat I'm going to be walking into as this new year and new decade approach:
"I count on one thing, the same God that never fails will not fail me now... In the waiting, the same God who's never late is working all things out. Yes I will, lift You high in the lowest valley. Yes I will, bless Your name. Yes I will, sing for joy when my heart is heavy, all my days... oh, yes I will."
"I'm gonna sing, in the middle of the storm, louder and louder, you're gonna hear my praises roar. Up from the ashes, hope will arise... My weapon is a melody."
The devil's not gonna bring me down.
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